How does each day manage to be Valentine's Day with this person?

 

I WAITED A LIFETIME FOR YOU: I am a bit sad that I didn't get a chance to be with Becki on Valentine's Day this year, but we're planning to have a date night tonight to make up for it. The weather was not great on Valentine's Day this week, which meant I got stranded in Dickinson. Becki and my family live in Mandan. The above rose and chocolates were meant to be in Becki's hands on Valentine's Day--not sitting on a kitchen counter. 

More than a year into my relationship with Becki, and I am overwhelmed at how each day manages to be Valentine's Day with her. It is for this reason that I was able to get through my week. There is no day in our relationship that doesn't seem like Valentine's Day. For this I'm grateful.  

The kindness between us is the thing that I value most. I have often recommended other couples improve their relationships by monitoring carefully the kindness that they show between them. This kindness between the couple is one that begins with kind words and continues with tone management. The couple is always careful to protect the sense of compassion between them. Outbursts are quickly corrected with kind words. It's normal for couples to argue, certainly. And that's okay. Arguments are natural between rational human beings. But people must always come back to kindness. They should try to return there as quickly as possible following a disagreement, however large or small. Often, it's the smaller disagreements that must be prioritized. 

KINDNESS BETWEEN US LOOKS LIKE THIS: More than words, kindness between a couple extends to small gestures like washing the dishes when the other cannot. I am incredibly grateful for this amazing relationship God has blessed me with. In Becki, daily, I feel the kindness between us. Besides dishes, it means putting the other first whenever possible. For instance, I just got my dream vehicle: A all-wheel drive Highlander Hybrid. I can sleep in the back! That will be so much fun for my camping adventures. And what did I do? I choose to leave the vehicle with Becki so that she can use it for her daily driving instead of me. I want her to enjoy a new car. I want her to feel a bit safer and more relaxed when driving. 

A daily example of how to grow the kindness between a couple is texting. I know it sounds simple, but couples should text each other more frequently. Becki and I are persistent texters. I love, love getting a text from her. It's as exciting as the first time she ever texted me! We have a fun tradition, in fact, of just texting each other cute Corgi pics. While, mostly I do this, admittedly! No explanation needed for "Why a corgi pic?" You can't look at a Corgi and NOT smile. That's why I text her these. I want her to smile unexpectedly in her day. 

This Valentine's Day "week," I want to express my love for Becki. She's everything to me. The kindness we are building between us is protection from later arguments. It's protection for our hearts. It's protection for our minds. This kindness between us, something we manage carefully, is the foremost means of ensuring challenges in life don't break us apart. I very much look forward to our Valentine's Date tonight, Becki. We're planning a dinner, then a play afterwards. My gratitude for her knows no limits. The sense of kindness between us grows stronger each day. Protect your kindness. Be grateful for the kindness you feel when you're with someone.